my iphone hates me

So I broke down and got a new iPhone about 2 weeks ago, my old one was shutting off all the time.  I was missing texts and emails from people so I decided to move on to the iPhone 4S.   Awesome, until this morning.   Suddenly I can’t play music without earbuds…my rant is below.   I can’t seem to find a fix.  Can you help me?